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The American Wasteland                                    Editor: Gary Greenberg                                                 Issue # 1

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Quote of the Day

"You can fool all of the people some of the time,
  and some of the people all of the time, and that's all I need."
William Jefferson Clinton

Vulture Watch

Imaginary news stories about the people you love to hate

KIng Vulture

Kansas Outlaws Intelligent Thinking
Declaring intelligent thought a hate-crime against faith-based Christians, Kansas outlawed intelligent thinking. SWAT teams immediately arrested sixteen biologists as the Governor called in the National Guard to stop rifle-bearing teachers from escaping across the state line. Will Kansas bleed again?   Read the full story

Clinton Y2K Conspiracy to Extend Term Through 21st Century
Secret documents accidentally uncovered in the course of a Judicial Watch lawsuit against the Clinton administration reveal Presidential plans to use the Y2K computer bug as a way to extend Clinton's term of office to the end of the 21st century. The White House denies the charge. Does a new scandal threaten the Clinton Presidency?   Read the full story.

Secret Shocker
Microsoft Proposes Merger with DOJ
An inside peek at secret negotiations in the Microsoft anti-trust case.
Candidates Surveyed on Campaign Finance Reform
Current and past Presidential candidates propose a wide range of campaign finance reforms.
Buchanan Staff Fears Pat Flawed By Y1K Bug
Come New Year's, is Buchanan's memory bank set to roll back an entire millennium?
Team Gore: Can Alpha Be More Than A Zero
Political bottom feeders were shocked to learn that Al Gore has paid big bucks to a bubble-brained feminist whose job it will be to transform Al Gore from an Ur Geek into an Alpha lesbian. What other changes are in store? The American Wasteland tags along with the Gore campaign.
Giuliani-Clinton Race Drives Up NY Suicide Rate
New revelations explain the mysterious rise in New York's homicide rate.


Rave On: The Editorial Page

Editorial rants on the issues of the day

Mr. Heston. Take Back Your Ten Commandments.
With an ever-increasing number of biblically illiterate politicians pandering to ever-larger caucuses of religiously intolerant voters, it's no surprise that a major move is underfoot to force children to absorb the hate-filled messages implicit in the Ten Commandments. What do the Ten Commandments really say? And why shouldn't they be placed in the schools?   Read the editorial.

What Is the Year 2000 the Millennium Of?
With all the debate over whether the millennium begins after midnight of either December 31, 1999 or 2000, has it occurred to anyone to ask what this is the millennium of? It is certainly not the 2000th year after the birth of Jesus.
Read the editorial.


Max Splatter: Critic-at-Large

Max says this is what he saw. Who are we to quibble?

Film Review   The Wizard of Oz (Director's Cut)
Max SplatterDon't miss Vic Fleming's riveting drama about a runaway delinquent caught between feuding drug lords in depression era immigrant Manhattan. Garland is brilliant as the Kansas slacker who becomes a mob assassin. MGM toned down the social commentary with a few transparent script changes but the director's cut allows the original vision to shine through in ways few ever imagined.   Read the full review.

Television:   La Femme Nikita
Their ends are just but their means are ruthless.
Television:   Left Wing
Their ends are just but their means are ruthless.
Television:   The Practice
Their ends are just but their means are ruthless.

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The American Wasteland is, written, edited, designed, and copyrighted by Gary Greenberg.
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 Vulture Watch, Rave On, and Max Splatter: Critic-at Large are trademarks of Gary Greenberg.